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  • Hostage to Silence

Good Communication Doesn't Have to Be Verbal

Brady received a message from a subscriber this past Summer. Unfortunately, we somehow missed it. Our apologies, Janice! Here is her thoughtful question and Brady's response.

I would love to have your help with understanding more about what my grandson is thinking and how him not being able to communicate makes him feel?

You first have to understand how frustrating it is to not be able to communicate good. Good communication is not something that comes easy for us. Ways I communicate are good eye contact, my hand movements and sounds. If someone is around me enough they will start to learn my noise. Typing brought my voice to life. Now I have my own say in my own life. Before typing I just felt like I was in the background of my family's life. Your grandson is probably thinking he wants to feel included and for you to believe he is good and smart. My advice to you is good communication does not have to be verbal. Hope this finds you.

This question is very important.

Every noise, gesture and behavior is communication. Some are easy, such as smiling and laughing. They represent something positive and happy.

But what about those that represent a negative situation or feeling? For example, you are in a grocery store and you see a person making loud noises, running up the isles or hitting themselves in the head. The first impression is that the person is undisciplined or being a brat — when the reality could be the florescent lights are too bright, or the humming sounds the lights make hurt their ears, or they feel self-conscious that everyone is staring at them. Maybe they were not given the option of going grocery shopping and are mad. Most times the actual answer isn't the most obvious.

In everyday life, nonverbal cues aren't as necessary but can be helpful. A person wringing their fingers or bouncing their knees might show they are nervous or scared. People on the spectrum are no different, but for some, nonverbal cues are their main form of communicating. Learning what their cues mean could be the difference between someone getting hurt or not.

Thank God for Facilitated Communication. We no longer have to guess what is going on with Brady. He can just type it to us.

Title: Rain

The rain comes down hard today.
Grey skies make me feel hopeful.
Hopeful because i know tomorrow will be brighter.
Real sunshine helps your soul.
Warms you from the outside in.
Dark clouds always pass after a bad storm and the sun
comes out to heal.
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HI Brady,

I had written you previously to say how glad I was you were back writing your blog. I also mentioned that I had taken little poetry workshop. Your poem today was lovely. It actually encouraged me to share one of my poems with you. It is not as insightful as yours, but I am learning. I hope you enjoy it.


Water Feb. 17, 2021

Dripping in a sink.

Drumming rain on windows.

Dropping off your nose in summer.

Crashing as icicles from the roof.

Dew falling from trees.

Mist rising from marsh.

Streams gentle flow to the ocean.

Raging violent seas,

Divided by the Hand of God

On the second day.

Hostage to Silence

Hi Dotty, Brady loved your poem. Thank you for sharing. I’m not sure if you read his post “some questions answered” from February 25 but he has a message there for you. Thank you for following Hostage to Silence and commenting regularly. He really appreciates it. Sincerely, Danielle (Mom)

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