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  • Hostage to Silence

Autistic vs. Having Autism

I believe this is one of the biggest arguments in the autism world. Some believe how you use the word describes how you see your child. For example, saying your child "has autism" implies that autism is only a part of your child. And saying your child "is autistic" defines your child as a whole. I, for one, don't think too deeply on how I use the wording. I interchange them as needed in the sentence structure. But, I take things at face value and don't tend to try to find hidden meanings in things.

I thought I'd go right to the expert and ask Brady. Following are a few writing excerpts that address the theme.

But a word of warning, dear reader — these are some heavy thoughts. Like everyone, Brady has ups and downs, and it is good to share them with the world — especially when verbal language does not come easily.


For your blog, mom wants to know how you feel about being called autistic vs having autism? Which do you prefer and why?

First, just want to say that it feels like I'm being labeled. Don't know. I think autism is so broad. I'm easier to notice. Some people you wouldn't notice. So does that make me autistic and they have autism? When we are labeled we are the same no matter how you say it.


Title: A Different Boy

Dream of another life as a different boy.
This boy would become the comedian of the school.
Good company would follow him wherever he went.
Dream of having a beautiful girlfriend for some good fun.
Dear boy would be loved by everyone.
Really can‘t image a life like that.
My family would worry less and get out more.
Guess everything would be better for everyone.

Do you have anything else to share?

Just trying to bevolen. That I'm hopeful for that boy still.

You are that boy, you just don't realize it right yet.


Brady has come so far over the past three years. It just breaks my heart he still has these insecurities. The pride his father and I feeling is unmeasurable. But, I guess last week was a tough one for him. He wrote a second poem.

Title: Sad Lone Boy.

Some days just feel hopeless.
Foolish of me to believe otherwise.
Some days seem ok dreaming and some days I despise.
The days i struggle are longer than the rest.
Some days like these very much seem like a test.
False dreams fill my heart.
can my brain and body be completely apart?
Ready for a good day.
Wish hopeful dreams is where i could stay.

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